The eleven tried and tested tips that will spice up your online dating direct
life immediately…
Success in online direct dating depends totally on how you project yourself
in that little personal ad you put on a dating site. What you put in that
personal profile can be the difference between having dates beating a path
to your door, or nothing but tumble weed blowing through your online dating
life. Do not under estimate the importance of your personal profile or just
‘throw something up’ and hope for the best.
How many times have you shied away from hitching on to a dating direct
site only because you didn’t think writing personals ads was your
forte? A whole lot of people are dissatisfied with the way they wrote their
ad and they may not be entirely wrong in feeling that way.
Your personal profile (or personal ad) is the most important part of your
online direct dating experience because it is your advertisement and
your sales pitch! It is that little ad that is going to be the first thing
noticed by other singles. So the better you write your ads the higher is
the possibility of getting more singles interested in you. You want it to
be unique and you want it to have the bling factor! Let the net in shining
amour bring you your dream date with these eleven top tips!
1) Know Thyself
A lot of people get stuck or get a bit of writers block trying to write their
own personal profiles. It can be a daunting task to write an add about yourself
that is intended to attract your dream date! Here is a helpful tip for you;
Ask your closest family and friends about how they see you. You want them
to be honest but you also want them to focus on your positive qualities that
would be attractive to your potential mate. Really listen to them because
how we see ourselves is often not how others see us. Their perception of
you is valuable information, because they know you better than anyone! You
may find that you thought you were a great dancer and your friends may all
mention in their description of you that you dance like a scared octopus.
Then again they may say your charming and have a great sense of humor when
you just thought you were childish and loud! Listen and use this great
information in your personals
2) Create a unique and descriptive username
Many people skip through this bit giving it no importance at all but your
user-name is the first hint at what kind of person you are. It needs to be
original, memorable, and try to get across a hint of who you are in just
a handful of letters.
What you do not want to do is use clichés or sound desperate for a
date. (I recently saw (honeyimhome) and (Icouldbetheone) which both sound
pretty desperate to me and also (aloneinLA) which is an instant turn off!
As well, you don’t want to write meaningless usernames like (CK1923)
None of these examples tell you anything about the person at all and this
is what 70 – 80% of usernames are like. Browse through any dating
direct site and you’ll see it’s true. You want to describe
a little piece of who you are in your user-name so think of things like your
personality type, hobbies or interests and those kinds of things. Be positive
and go ahead and flatter yourself and write about your great qualities. Here
are some examples of great usernames I have seen around…There is
CoastalBoyRacer – This is a guy who lives by the beach and is passionate
about racing cars Zest4life – This is a woman who is very adventurous
and outgoing and it describes her well. EasyGoingCowboy – This is a
guy who lives in the country, loves everything country, drives a ute and
just loves to have fun. So you can start to see how you can use your username
to start to paint the picture of who you are. Give yourself time: think of
a name before sitting down to complete your profile. Try not to use numbers
or unoriginal cheesy stuff
3) Tips for creating your description of yourself
You really have to approach writing this as if you were writing a resume
or a marketing piece. It’s a sales pitch to a potential mate. Great
ads are the ones that grab eyeballs and push people into action. A great
advertisement should be a like a personalized invitation asking others to
get in touch. Stand out by being creative in your personal profile. Instead
of doing the regular age and vital stats thingy, use personalized exiting
copy telling people why they should want to date you. Don’t be afraid
to tell all the great things about you. You’re aloud to flatter yourself.
Confidence is one of the most attractive traits you can portray in your writing.
That being said, keep the next point in mind…
4) Be honest
Make sure you resist the urge to embellish the truth too much when writing
your online personals profile. There’s really no need and it only makes
things complicated later. There are plenty of fish in the online dating direct
sea and you have got a great chance of meeting someone who’s attracted
to the real you. Of course, there’s no need to tell your darkest secrets
– just keep it real. The last thing you want is to have to worry about
all the lies you’ve spun when you’re on the dates you’ve scored.
This is a trap many people fall into. Don’t let it happen to you. 5)
Write a compelling headline
Along with your picture and your username, this is what people view when
browsing dating direct sites so it’s your chance to get them to open
your full profile and find out more about you. Your headline should compel
people to read on and find out more.
Don’t be shy about being there and write - “I’m new to this
sort of thing” - and don’t write boring or uninteresting information
like “My name’s Jan, I’m 40 and am looking for love in NSW”
This isn’t compelling. It’s boring and will most likely be overlooked
by your dream date. Again, like with your username, think of getting positive
things about who you are across to the reader. What are you passionate about?
What are your attractive personality traits? Hobbies? Who are you in a nutshell?
Even things like your favorite book or movie can work to say a lot about
who you are. Make it intriguing if you can. You want the headline to tempt
people to read more. Take your time and have fun with it! Jan (from above
example) is actually a beach addict so she should try writing more about
herself. Maybe something like ‘Friendly fun loving surfer gal, always
up for an adventure’ that wasn’t so hard was it? Browse through
dating direct sites and check out what other people are writing for their
headlines to give you some ideas of what works and what sux.
6) Know what you want
What are you looking for in an online dating direct? There are people out
there looking for one night stands, fun casual dating or a life partner.
Be specific and let them know what you’re after. Do you want to meet
someone for long chats curled up on the couch, and romantic dinners by
candlelight, or would you rather find someone that likes skydiving and camping?
Make sure get across in your ad what you are looking for in a person. So
if you’re not into partying in clubs or nude scuba diving, then don’t
write it just so you can try and impress the other person. It will come back
to bite you on the bum later!
7) Have the right photo (And yes you must have a photo)
It vitally important to have a good quality photo if you’re serious
about online dating direct. Statistics show that it will increase your click
through rate anywhere from 20% up to 45%. You must have a good photo. Now
when I say ‘good photo’ it doesn’t mean you have to look like
a rock star. It means it clear and good sized picture of your face. You want
to look friendly so please smile. Another thing….don’t pick your
favorite picture of you if it isn’t a realistic portrayal of how you
look day to day (you know what I mean, we all have them) Remember, you are
dating and may meet these people in person later so you want them to have
a realistic portrayal of your looks. Oh and don’t use one where your
ex has been cut out but you can still see their arm around you!
8) Make your meaning clear
Be aware that 75% of communication is lost when all we have is words. People
cannot hear your tone of voice or see your body language so sometimes it’s
hard to get across your meaning in words alone. Be especially weary of using
humor or things like clever lines out of movies, that sort of thing. What
may sound funny to you as your writing it may actually sound completely crazy
or even offensive when read by someone else later. I have seen people make
this mistake a lot in internet dating direct and its one of the biggest mistakes.
If you must do it, please get a friend or family member to read over it before
you submit it to give you a second opinion.
9) Check out the competition
Have browse around dating direct sites and see what kind of things grab your
attention and make you enticed to read more, and what kinds of things just
don’t work or turn you off. Let some people be an example for you and
some people be a warning what to steer clear of. Those which usually stand
out are original, personal, and direct. Take a look at others and then apply
that to your own personal profile. What can you say about yourself in a single
sentence which makes you irresistible to a potential partner?
10) Spelling
It is obvious but it needs to be said. Make sure you give your personals
a check over before submission for spelling and grammar. People do notice
and it can be a real turn off.
11) Avoid clichés and corny lines
And lastly, please avoid clichés and corny lovey dove talk in your
personals. This is a big warning to you all because it is surely the number
one turn off. There is nothing original or interesting about writing things
like. “Are you the woman I have been waiting all my life for?”
or “looking for love online? Maybe I could be the one”. It
doesn’t tell anything fun or interesting about you and frankly, it only
makes you sound a bit desperate.
If your on an internet dating direct website already everyone knows your
there looking to date so avoid the temptation to write things like the above.
Your ad should be all about you. It should be a fun and punchy piece of writing
that is original and fresh. Just let it come from the heart.
About the Author
Mellissa O’Brien is a writer who has become an expert in online dating
direct and written over 200 articles on the topic including independent reviews
of top Dating sites plus Essential Tips and Advice for Singles using the
internet For Traditional or Adult dating direct.
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